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Thursday, April 15, 2010

No Escape

Loss is a part of my life and I can't deny or ignore it, but I don't want to own it and I certainly don't know how to embrace it... yet.

My parents have been gone for two and a half years today.

Two and a half years too many.

There is no escape from loss.

Loss follows you wherever you go.

Reminders are everywhere.

Grief and loss are exhausting.

Time is no cure for grief or loss; they are constant.

As much as I don't want the loss of my parents to define who I am, it is part of me.

I think about them every day and miss them more than words can describe.

I'm angry that they were taken from me too soon and heartbroken that you will never get to meet them.

This photo was taken on my wedding day, August 4, 2007. It was the last weekend I saw my parents alive.

I am grateful for the 35 years I had with my mom and dad, my memories of happier times, the lessons they taught me, photos I have of them, letters they wrote me, books, music and movies that we shared and enjoyed as a family and my sister, who shares my loss. Together, along with your father, we will make sure that you know your grandparents.

"Our loved ones are never truly gone from us. They remain in the landscape of our own life, as we will for those who come after us. So do right by them by celebrating your own greatness as well as remembering theirs." - Allison DuBois

I press on because I know that my parents would want me to and because I believe that best is yet to be.

Day 51/100

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2 Comments:

Blogger Natalie said...

Sending hugs your way....xoxxo

April 15, 2010 at 11:02 AM  
Blogger Leah said...

This is a great posting for today. Thanks for letting me borrow it for my blog. You've always been so much better than me at explaining your feelings in words.
I can't believe that it's been 2 and a half years since mom and dad died. It's weird that some days it feels like just yesterday and other days it feels like it's been years and years.
Thank you for everything you've done for me these past 2 and a half years. I know that I wouldn't have gotten through this time without you in my life. XOXOXO

April 17, 2010 at 3:23 PM  

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